Run
by RaritajiGolden
Summary: Will Haldir ever become a true brother to Rumil and Orophin? Or is duty all he has to offer?(Chapter 2 up now, YAY!!! Go see, PLEASE!!!! Remember to R & R!!!)
1. The Storm

The spring was warm against my already heated skin, and I sighed gratefully as I sunk into the semi hot water, my eyes closing half way. I heard Orophin and Rumil chattering away somewhere in front of me. They usually left me out of things, and never told me afterwards, so I just ignored them. Ever since I was small, just an elfing, I have been apart from them. They have always been so united, and I have always been so alone. As I began to slide deeper into my own thoughts, Orophin's voice came to me.  
  
"Brother, have you ever considered sharing a day with the two of us?"  
  
I looked at him and blinked, coming up with the most obvious answer I could find. "I am now."  
  
Orophin sighed heavily and shook his head, glaring at me rather rudely. I found it inappropriate.  
  
"Orophin, what is the matter with you?"  
  
"Do you EVER do ANYTHING other than WORK, Haldir? Do you? Anything at all?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
I heard Rumil's sigh from behind Orophin and sighed myself. I had come here to find relaxation. I had found stress. Woop dee do. Aren't I lucky?  
  
"You hardly ever relax- " Orophin trailed off when he saw my expression.  
  
I sat up a little now, my eyes growing sharper. I remember once, when I was on duty, a Raider had said I had eyes like knives. I killed him.  
  
"Orophin. I came here to relax, to let my muscles rest for a little while, and you are ruining it. I want you to back off, brother, so I can sit here in peace for once. I choose to work hard out there, and if you two want to slack and let me do everything for you, then go ahead. I happen to ENJOY my duty!"  
  
Orophin's jaw was growing tight, and I knew that I had crossed the line. I pressed my advantage and stood, water cascading down my naked body while my skin gleamed in the sunlight. I could have been a King. I should have been. "While I sit out there in trees, you two are in your beds, reading or fucking each other senseless. I go out there by choice because one day I might not be there when something terrible happens. And I do NOT want that." I arched an eyebrow, seeing the rage in Orophin's eyes and ignoring it. "Do you?"  
  
I saw tears sparkling at the corners of Orophin's eyes. I watched as he turned and ran toward the cover of the forest. It reminded me of myself, reminded me of all those times I had run away without even trying to talk things out. I looked at Rumil briefly before walking from the spring. I went to my clothes, but only pulled on my leggings, in too much of a hurry to put on my tunic, even though it would have taken less than a minute to do. The liquid pouring across my cheeks was hidden from my youngest brother as I slowly walked away, needing time to vent out my frustrations and think.  
  
Walking had always helped me, but running, in my mind, was better. I didn't run, though. Instead, I did one of the stupidest things I have ever done. I punched a tree. Just like that. I slammed my right fist hard into it, then just hoped that the crack was the trunk, and not me. It was me.  
  
Half an hour after I had efficiently messed up my hands, Rumil and Orophin came. I looked up at them, then rose to my feet(after I punched the tree, I cursed and punched it some more, then fell over. Oh yes, I have balance *snort*). They spoke quietly to me, and I went with them, not fighting at all, not like I wanted to. I went into my talan, shutting the door hard behind me so my brothers would know to leave me alone. When they didn't follow me, I slunk over to my bed and settled down on it, not bothering about the covers. My eyes closed, and I just rested there for a while, not really sleeping. I was too upset to sleep. Pictures, visions entered my mind, and I forced my eyes to open. I still saw them, though. I saw the hurt on Orophin's face, the held back pain on Rumil's. I knew I was the cause of it, I always was. In a group of three, one was always left out. In this case, the person left out was me. It had been like that since I can remember, except when Orophin and I were fighting. Then it was anything but pleasant. Call me a bully if you want to, but I thought I was defending myself. I suppose neither of them ever saw it that way.  
  
In the morning, it felt like lava was being poured into my skull, right behind my ears. I let out a moan and rolled over so that I fell right off the edge of my bed. That made my head hurt even worse, as well as other parts of my body that I really couldn't name so early in the morning. To make things even better, there was a pounding on my door. I slowly rose to my feet, then picked up the nearest throwable(Shut up, I don't care if that isn't a word) object, my left boot, and hucked it at the door.  
  
BANG!!!!!  
  
There was silence for about half a second, then more knocking.  
  
"Haldir, don't make me kick down this door!"  
  
I moaned in agony as Orophin's voice filled my ears, and I lifted the other boot, ready to throw it right at him. "Go away, Orophin! I'm busy!"  
  
A short pause and a fierce crash later, and I was missing a door. I threw my boot at Orophin's head. He caught it with ease, then set it down neatly beside him. Rumil entered behind Orophin, and a new wave of pain that I didn't even know existed assaulted my head.  
  
A glare from Rumil sent me on my ass on the bed. He hadn't given me such a look since I screwed up his hair at a grand feast, here in Lorien.  
  
"Haldir, dearest brother, will you not do something with us today? We can go riding in the woods, or fishing. Or we can have races," Orophin suggested.  
  
I was about to speak when a sharp crack split through the air. My breath caught in my throat, and I shot up from the bed. I knew what it was: Thunderstorm. Orophin dragged Rumil and I over into his own talan and closed the door behind him before drawing the curtains. Thunderstorms were liked by all elves except for me. I got lost in a storm once, and no one came to find me until it was all over. Orophin said he had found me inside a hollow log, right in the middle. He had had to coax me out, and he didn't even apologize for letting me go like that. I saw their faces. Rumil and Orophin had just stared at me when I ran. I guess they were used to it. They should be by now.  
  
"Would you like to come snuggle close under the blankets, Haldir?" Rumil asked gently.  
  
I looked at him sternly, then shook my head, cringing when a stroke of lightning lit the room up like an explosion. I moved quietly over to a corner, determined to stay there until the storm was over. I could see it in my brother's eyes that they were bored. I watched them, fear in my own eyes. I could feel adrenaline pumping through me, and I was itching to run out into that storm to conquer my fear. I hated being afraid like this. It made me feel vulnerable and open, so out of control I couldn't even comprehend it.  
  
"Would you like to, brother?"  
  
I looked at Orophin suspiciously, then saw where he was pointing. Rumil was there already, his lithe body spread out over the sheets like a dessert after dinner. The scene made me feel sick. I felt bile rising in my throat, and my heart shattered when I saw Orophin move to Rumil. They kissed, and it was hot and vibrant, writhing with electricity. I couldn't stand it anymore.  
  
I turned, and then I was off and running. I pushed through the door, holding back a great sob as I rushed into the howling storm. I slammed the door behind me and sprinted downward, slipping and nearly falling upon the slick surface under my feet. My breaths were broken now, and Ibreathed heavily, almost panting, my eyes wide. I did fall then, skidding the last few feet to the ground. Then I was up again, bolting headlong for the forest. I wanted to get away from my brothers, just as I have always done. Scared and cold, I kept going, despite the words in my head. Run, Haldir, RUN, my mind taunted me, mocked me, and laughed at me, all for my foolish ways. Yes, run, run, run!!! I crossed through a shallow stream, barely able to keep on my feet as thunder snarled overhead, causing me to cry out in terror. I was in a blind panic. That scene had done it. Orophin and Rumil had found such peace between themselves, such unity...such love. Tears were streaming down my face, and I gasped for breath before collapsing, my clothes sticking to my skin as shivers ran through me, not from the cold. I didn't bother to move, and I ducked my head away as lightning casted the forest in a blinding light. I could feel the wind as it tried to suck the warmth from my body, could feel it pull and tug at my drenched hair. I bowed my head, on my hands and knees, choking on my own sobs. I didn't have the strength, nor the will, to hold them back. 


	2. Fear is in us all

Thank you all for your reviews. I do appreciate criticism, but ONLY when it is necessary. So far my reviewers have been both helpful and responsible. I hope it remains that way.  
  
I wasn't lost, no. I knew my way around this forest probably better than any other elves who resided here. But I hated thunderstorms. This hatred was against almost everything I knew, but fear possessed all races, be them elf, hobbit, dwarf, or man. As I knelt there, feeling alone and forgotten, I let my thoughts drift. They all collected around an event that changed my life, in one way or another. But to think of it now was pure torment, for the storm brewing overhead was merely beginning.  
  
I was an elfing, and as always, I was apart from my brothers. I was practicing cleaning my weapons. I wanted to be the best at it. Orophin and Rumil were in Orophin's talan as far as I knew because I could hear them speaking in low, hushed voices. I listened while I worked, but because of how softly they were speaking, I could only make out a few words.  
  
"Storm."  
  
"Can't leave."  
  
"He needs."  
  
I blinked. Were they talking about me? And a storm was coming? From what I had heard, they were going to remain there alone with each other. I dreaded the possibility that they had altogether forgotten about me, but it was there, lingering on the edge of my mind. A wild crack of thunder made me look up, and I noticed that my door was open. The patter of rain began, and I slowly slid off my bed, gently placing the knife and the stone on the blankets. I moved casually to the door. I didn't mind storms. They were a part of nature, and anything to do with the earth soothed me, comforted me, no matter how violent.  
  
As I reached for the door to close it, thunder wrecked havoc throughout the sky, and lightning shone like death's eyes, crashing toward the ground, zinging with its powerful electricity. My breath caught in my throat, and I stared wide eyed at the scene, which did not last more than a brilliant half second, if that. A smile crossed my lips, one of complete awe and fascination. I wanted to dance and sing out there, become one with the storm. I felt it, above all else, was my family. Rumil and Orophin were not, as they were nestled in warmth and comfort, finding reassurance in each other. I was saddened that I was not part of that, but the weather above fascinated me.  
  
Now I moved further outside, feeling the electricity as the storm drew me in. I had not forgotten about shutting the door, it just didn't seem to important now. I jumped as thunder roared particularly close, the snarl of an angry dragon, and lightning flickered through the clouds like blinking eyes. He drew back quickly and slammed the door shut, sure that Orophin and Rumil would hear. Them, and other older elves like Lord Celeborn, told me tales about dragons. Fear ripped at my insides, its claws digging deeper and deeper, driving me back until I was pressed against the wall. There must have been a dragon out there. In fact, I was so convinced that there was, I didn't move from the wall until morning.  
  
I sighed as I remembered, then shut it away like I did so many things. I heard shouting behind me, and I stood. My muscles were trembling, and all the emotion I had felt earlier left me terrified and exhausted. As warmth wrapped around me, I turned into it, felt a hard chest under my hands, smelt the familiar scent of family. It was Orophin. He wrapped the blanket securely around my shoulders and moved it over my head so the sound of thunder would be slightly muffled. It helped a little. Then I felt my feel leave the ground as he lifted me into his arms, felt the slight jarring of his long strides as he sprinted back toward home. He spoke to me, but over the wind and rain and lighting and thunder, the voice was lost to me, just another howl of the wind, just another snarl of the storm.  
  
Just before we entered the talan, I felt Orophin leap forward, as if he, too, were afraid of the lashing monster that owned the skies on this night.  
  
"Rumil, get me a towel," Orophin said urgently.  
  
My younger brother nodded, then went and fetched the softest one he could find, and brought it out to us. Orophin took it and smiled gratefully. I felt the blanket leave me, and then the feel of my clothes being stripped. I lifted my head just enough so that I could watch Rumil remove my drenched clothing. Relief shone in his eyes when he saw my movements, and I managed a small smile of my own before Orophin began wiping my shivering skin down with the towel. Orophin's hands were firm but gentle at once, and my trembling began to slow.  
  
"I will make a warm drink for you both," said Rumil.  
  
Before either of us could object, the driest brother turned and padded into the kitchen to fetch something warm and soothing. I shifted slightly, then looked at Orophin, fearing the worst when I saw his eyes. But the anger wasn't there. Instead I saw fear, concern, love, and compassion. Devotion was there as well, although I couldn't believe it.  
  
Rumil came now, and he offered us both warm mugs. Orophin took one, then handed it to me before taking his own. I sighed at the heat, then carefully took a sip. It was hot, and it burned me, so I blew on it a little before trying again. Although it was still quite hot, it was now bearable. I felt no embarrassment as I lay there with my brothers hovering over me, all of my clothing drenched and hanging on Orophin's dresser. It wasn't so cold anymore, and as the air drifted over my skin, the last of my shivers left me.  
  
"How did you find me?" I asked softly, turning my eyes to Orophin after taking another sip of my drink.  
  
"An elfing could have followed your reckless trail, brother. It was visible even in the dark and howling storm."  
  
I nodded slightly, halfway done the warmth that resided in the mug.  
  
"We all need rest, Haldir. When you are finished, come to bed," Orophin said, using that no nonsense tone of his. It would do no good to argue, and so I nodded in agreement.  
  
I watched Orophin and Rumil undress down to their leggings, then slide into bed. I looked around for Orophin's glass, then saw it on the bedside table. When I was finished my drink, I rose slowly to my feet, my limbs protesting softly. I ignored their cries and placed my mug next to Orophin's before sliding under the covers. Normally we would all sleep in our own separate beds, but tonight, in this storm, it was a great relief to be with them. I jumped with each stroke of lightning, with each clap of thunder.  
  
I felt the bed beneath me moving, and I looked over to see my brothers rearranging themselves. Orophin was beside me now, and he encouraged me to curl against him. I did so, and tucked my head in under his chin as I closed my eyes, not caring about duty or pride now. I just wanted the storm outside to stop. Eventually I opened my eyes again, and, judging by Orophin's breathing, I knew that he was asleep. I followed suit a few minutes later, the word of peace and dreams enclosing around me. 


End file.
